I guess I should back up a bit and give a little explanation of where exactly I work. I work for a Company that assists with the tax filing. It's product is an actual tax filing program. For the purpose of this demonstration we’ll call it… FastTax...
The following are mostly true events; well they were the dialogue I created after experiences very similar, if not identical to what happens below. I got a good laugh out of it, figured I could share it.
Its funny how placing a customer on hold when they cannot get the correct information for you turns on a light bulb in their head.
Me: "May I have your account number, it should be located on the letter you received" Customer: "I cant find it"
Me(pauses, looks irritated): "Let me place you on hold while I research the account a bit further"
::Customer Placed on hold::
Me(after a 2 minutes of hold time): "Thank you for holding, I apologize for the delay"
Customer: "I found the account number"
Me (Thinks to self, I knew you would): Excellent what is it?
Same conversation (updating credit card number)
Me: I am ready for your new credit card number
Customer: Do you want me to read it to you?
Me: (to self) No, I aced my mind reading class, is it :: mumbles some number::
Me (for real this time in a sugary sweet voice.): Yes, please.
The following below didn’t actually happen… well... in my head it did.
Me: "I'm sorry Mr. Customer, are you retarded? No this is a serious question, do you suffer from mental disabilities that would enable you to function and think as a normal person?" Customer: Uh, no...
Me: Are you sure? You could probably get a tax cut for it.... Think about that for a second. I'll hold.
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