Just cross my fingers, throw another nickel in the well...

Welcome to the Emo side.

I’m having a lot of set backs to moving here.. they’re mostly emotional and purely to the fact that I’m extremely lonely. I mean my aunts cool and all, but I miss the inside jokes between my friends and I. I feel like I’m missing out on everything that we used to do... Sort of like the little kid that doesn’t want to go to bed.

I started school today, It should be an interesting 6 weeks, the teacher seems pretty down to earth so thats good, my first thought was oh man she’s a bitch, but once she actually started talking that thought was totally thrown out the window.

I really don’t get my aunts thinking process all that much and its probably mostly just because I’m so used to doing things on my own terms. But since she controls the money its hard for me to get some things done without her... I guess I’m really just irritated that she blew up on me because I was sitting there this afternoon working on my Itunes and Ipod playlists and not doing what she probably thought I should have been doing. But it really irritated the crap out of me because she sitting there telling me I should be getting ready for class and making sure I paid for the course then going to the bookstore and getting the books for my class... and those are things she has to do since I do not have the $$. So I immediately get up to get the page up so that she can process the payment and when I get her she says “I’m busy taking a shower, I’ll do it later.”

In my mind I guess I would have just said something to me after the shower instead of going off on me about how I wasn’t doing anything to prepare for a class. In my mind I also knew what I was going to do. I was going to gather the things I needed (Pen/Paper) because I didn’t want to show up to the class with books I has just bought only to learn that we don’t need them. The buy back price is freaking ridiculous! As for paying for the course, I was going to do that as soon as I was finished with my playlist that I had to recreate, which probably would have been about the time she finished with her shower... Of course she couldn’t have known this, so I guess I can’t blame her. But I just wish she would give me some credit that I do know what I am doing sometimes, and these days if I don’t, I tend to ask for help... which is an improvement for me.

I’m just really upset about moving back to be told what to do. Not to mention I was under the impression that my room and board would be in the 300 range, not 500. I basically could have stayed in tucson and not spent the money for the ticket and moving out here if I knew that each month I was going to have to pay 500.00 to not have my own place or be able to do what I want....I payed roughly 500.00 month when I was in Tucson before i left... probably a little bit over... but not much.

A bit of an advantage for me is that I did get roughly 3000.00 in debt paid off my credit report... I have no debt now, just paid accounts, which isn’t really good, but its not that bad either... So that is good. The bad news is the 10k allotment that we all (Trustees) received is pretty much spent, and I still don’t have my own vehicle.

I had hoped to have had one within a few weeks of me being here, but at this rate it probably wont be until August/September before that happens. Which disappoints me because a car for me would be a bit more of freedom for me. I just don’t feel right taking my aunts car whenever I want to like I would if I had my own vehicle. Not to mention I’m back in a Ford Exploder... which I think could possibly be worse than Forest... In order to get out of the car, I have to roll down the back window and reach around to open the door from the outside, the radio works - but you can’t tell which station you are on, the lights on the dash are out, and the AC is broken, it just blows outside air in, which in this heat is quite.... muggy. Might as well roll the windows down... but I can’t roll down the driver window...which would actually make getting out of the car a lot easier.

But hey, I could be taking the bus?

But never the less, I still miss my friends...